Goodbye letters : Pain that healed me : I am happy to say Goodbye

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Goodbye letters : Pain that healed me : I am happy to say Goodbye

I am happy to say goodbye

 

Legends say

“Women quickly recognizes the eyes of the loved ones”

“The touch of the loved ones is immediately recognized”

“The commitment of the loved ones is instantly believed”

But there was one woman who could not foresee the intentions of the devil entering in her life.The storm is still swirling around her and it’s the worst storm she has ever encountered in her life. The storm that lasted for 12 long years and still haunts her day and night. As they say there is a karmic connection that was fated to meet and collide and trap the innocent heart with wicked lies.

Never look back Long pending goodbye letter

Never look back Long pending goodbye letter

She used to live such a relaxed life and never believed in the presence of evil forces in this cruel world. She believed in fairy tales and she was always comforted by her family. She could never surmise the wickedness in people she would meet, blame it on her conservative nature as she always maintained distance from everybody around her. She was too shy to open up to anyone. The only dream she ever had was to have a family and be the best mother. But all dreams are not meant to be fulfilled. Some dreams are shattered and then you embrace the bitter reality of LIFE. Life will break you and then make you, yes make you a stronger person.

This is not a story of any woman who gave up, this is a tale of a woman who displayed faith in the devil for years. But unlike any other millions of women out there, now she is on her own and is proud of what she did and what she didn’t.

The pain that healed me!Some pain make you strong some pain makes you weak. Before I share the story of my life I want to thank god for putting me through all this, I never knew how strong I can be. Life taught me a lot. I had my share of sorrow where my eyes would be numb as they moaned for the loss of a dream to have a family. A marriage  that the society imposed on her, it was not the family that she once dreamed of.

 

Goodbye letter

Never look back Long pending goodbye letter

Never look back Long pending goodbye letter

When god keeps giving a signal to walk out of a dead marriage, What do we married women do? Shockingly and hopelessly, we still don’t walk out, we still hang on to the cruelty of the man who doesn’t deserve you and the family that you have nested for him

 

One of those thousands days that still haunts me every day.

The devil took away my son to his parents place in Calcutta, days passed by but he never returned.

By each passing day, I was waiting for my son to return. Every night I writhed myself to sleep, moaning my son’s name. Whenever I would ask the devil – When will I get to see my son? He would make implausible excuses to deepen the pain of being away from my son. The devil who was just a sperm donor and he wouldn’t  understand the mother’s pain, who has single handed NURTURED her son day and night.

The mother’s heart was tired of waiting but the devil showed no mercy. When the endurance inside me gave up I rushed to the airport, I never anticipated the consequences of embarking towards a totally new city Calcutta.The devil rebuffed all my calls when I told her that I am coming to take my son. The devil was more apprehensive about the expense that I would incur on the tickets to go to Calcutta. Anyhow, I reached the Calcutta airport at 2.30 am and he reluctantly came to pick me up with my son.

He refused to even look at me to even say “Hi”. I wondered “Was he guilty of putting me through all this? ” or “Was he showing his toughness that I don’t give a shit about your presence?”. I grabbed my son into my arms with a sigh of relief and then he took me to a guest house, where he dumped me with my son. He didn’t even enter the room of the guest house and said I am going. He just left in seconds, and I glanced at the room thinking he must be larking around and he will be back after getting some dinner for me. But he never returned that night, he went to his parents’ house while I and my son were in the guest house hoping just assuming he will pacify me but then I contemplated and realized that he will not realize his misdeeds.

I was in total disbelief that I am in a new city and my so called legal husband dumped me in the guest house. I was life half dead woman who could not muster up strength and cried like a baby who was left on a lonely dark street by her own parents. I was tormented but somehow I made my son lie down while still struggling to give a fake smile to show  as if everything was fine. After my son went to sleep, I felt as if I was locked in a suitcase hoping someone will come and rescue me. I couldn’t sleep the whole night, I was in trauma and literally I pinched myself wondering ” Is it a bad dream? or what?

Next morning, I had no penny to return back, I fumbled a few notes but it was not enough even for a train ticket. I was dependent on the devil so I called him to book the ticket to go to Gurgaon, but I was instantly asked one question “Where are the property papers of the house that we mutually own?” The house that my father bought.

For days and days he asked the same question and never stayed at the guest house. I was feeling like a second woman who is dumped in a room to be harassed so that he can extract whatever he can in the given situation. The guest house staff used to look down upon me as a second woman. I called his parents everyday expecting they can instill some humanity in their son, but they never picked up the phone. It was not surprising because all the harassment ideas were coming from them. He kept insisting on that you book your own tickets as I will not pay the money for your ticket, knowing I don’t have the money and I will not share the misery with my aged parents.

Never look back Long pending goodbye letter

Never look back Long pending goodbye letter

I thought of contacting the police station but then I was perturbed about the aftermath of getting into a police complaint. We all know how the legal constitution work and how much it gets dragged. I didn’t want to take more leaves and desperately wanted to resume the job back in Gurgaon. I started having severe pain in my breast which when shared with him, he happily ridiculed the pain I was experiencing. He dismissed it by saying give the property paper and get the ticket in return. He forced me to call my parents to get the guest house money which I did. One fine morning I mustered up the strength to run away from the guest house with my son. I packed the breakfast which we received in the morning and asked for more, thinking what if I would lose whatever little money I have, then what will I give to my son. I whimpered silently and all my childhood days memories  were flashing in front of me  of how I was raised by my parents, how we cared for each other.

I was howling all through the time and  was still in disbelief that how he abandoned a girl who picked him up from nothing and supported him all through his miseries. Who was dragging a dead relationship even after knowing the bitter reality that he was just a husband on paper? Who hid all his misgivings and pretended to the whole world that he is a nice man.

I had no money with me, I thought of trying my luck to ask if the ticket that he booked I can get the details from the station only. He messaged me where I am?  and to his disbelief I said at the railway station.I told him I will call my parents and will share everything and then he made an excuse that couldn’t afford the expense of the guest house so he said its better if you leave and he sent his parents to give the ticket. Later, the ticket dealer called him saying you need to accompany your family because you showed your id proof.

 

Thank god that I showed the courage to come to the station and threaten him that I will call my parents and disclose what all you put me through for so many days. Like any other Indian woman I returned home and served him food. I still can’t believe how forgiving I had been for so many years. But today when I look back I have mixed feeling of never giving up to save the marriage for my son but then I found enough strength and sense to realize my worth. Most importantly, I don’t need a sperm donor father tag, you don’t become a DNA father. You become a father by being around and nurturing your child.

 

I so wish I had the audacity to call my parents to rescue me, because the pain of being dumped and betrayed is so fresh in my heart, no forgiveness  can heal that. Every night I could barely open my eyes with all the harassment that man has caused me. Every day my eyes would get tired and the layers of never ending tears never stopped flowing. I would shrink my body with closed fist and would feel like going under the bed as if I was surrounded by monsters around me who were laughing at my situation.

 

Never look back Long pending goodbye letter

Never look back Long pending goodbye letter

 

Being beaten to death would have been less painful than reliving the days that I encountered for 12 years. I completely  lost my self-worth.I felt like a worthless piece of furniture.Like people say your body learns to heal itself, that’s what has been happening.The process of healing started when I realized my worth and the kind of woman I am. I value my existence and the strength comes from the fact that I will not give the power to the monster to be the decider of how I shape my life. It’s so true when people say “Whatever happens, happens for good” I thank god that I had the courage to lead a happy and fulfilling life.

Sample goodbye letter

Last day of a closure I will always remember 

 

This woman even pays the taxi money to her parents. ( Devil says ” My Honour ! I the devil will not even mention the monthly financial support that I have been providing to my parents which my legal wife never objected. In fact, once she even suggested to give more to them” But MY honour ” I object to Rs 500 she gives to her parents for taxi” And please don’t forget to mention that the parents come to take care of my son whenever he falls sick because My lord I am just a sperm donor father and never took responsibility of being available to the family at the time of need.

This women pays back the money which her parents spent on the house which they gifted us. ( My Lord ! I happily accept Dowry but never make it looks like a dowry! Why the hell the daughter objected to the house gifted to her at the time of marriage)

This woman don’t let me sleep and knocks the door at 5 am in the morning. ( 4 days in 4 months when I come to get a visa) As it was the room adjacent to the bathroom which is required in the morning in order to get ready for office and make my son get ready for school. My HONOUR I refuse to even open the door 4 times in 4 months even if my son misses his school. I am not bothered even if my legal wife would get scolding in the office. I am not here to make their life easier. I am here to get the visa so that I can again fly back and live a bachelor life.

On these ground I choose to apply for mutual consent.

Once I am Done I am Done Forever Goodbye

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It’s not at all heartbreaking to say Goodbye because I finally broke the cage that the society thrusted upon me. I finally mustered up the strength to say the final Goodbye. I finally realized that I will face the fight of getting my life back and I will join all the tiny fragments of my life. When writing the story of my life, the story will be bright like a sunshine. The one Goodbye that is long pending gave me the strength like nothing else.

Till the last blood drop in my body
Till the last breath
I will fight
I will not fight just for my 11 years wasted
I will fight

for every day horror
every day harassment
for every day emotional and physical pain
for every day lie that took away the faith in “Love”
for taking away a daughters love and shattering her soul into pieces .. Because her crime was to care for her old parents.
for testing patience of a woman who gave endless chances to her man to change
for making a mother feel used just like a trash
for showing that there is a difference between a genetic parent and a concerned parent
for using a woman who endured more than she could imagine
My fight is for every woman you have used and will use for your hidden motives.

BUT A BIG THANK YOU FOR TEACHING ME
That a woman alone can raise her child
A woman should walk out when enough is enough
For taking away the fear in me and giving me courage to stand up..
till the last breath in me my feelings for you will never change.

Wreck you into pieces .. Avenge is to get justice for the wrong.
Don’t beg for settlement because I should have settled this long time back..
There can never be any settlement for the pain that I and my parents have gone through because of your molestation… When a woman stand up she stands up strong.. no looking back..
I smile because God is watching over me… That supreme power knows the truth.
NOTHING IS HIDDEN FROM THAT SUPREME POWER.

You can’t buy the justice from that supreme power. In this birth only we will settle all our sins.
OUR DEEDS WILL FOLLOW US TILL THE END.

Thank you husband love letter

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Thank you husband love letter to my most lovable and loyal husband.

Love is not about how much you say ‘ I love you,’ but how much you can prove that it’s true.

Any successful marriage or for that matter any relationship require mutual understanding and care.

We need to create mutual care, respect and the love follows instantly. It’s like nurturing a baby from the very beginning.

Thank you husband love letter

Thank you husband love letter

A perfect marriage couple is not the one that don’t fight but that refuse to leave each other’s side even when going gets tough.

I would like to say Thank you to my husband for sticking by my side.

Thank you for being brutally honest with me when we started building the pillar of our relationship.

Thank you for choosing me the mother of your child.

Thank you for being loyal towards me no matter we were together or living far away from each other.

Thank you for considering my parents as your parents and caring for them as they are growing old.

Thank you for being the pillar of support whenever I broke down.

Thank you for guiding me whenever I got lost in the story of my life.

Thank for being there for me and taking care of me like a baby when I was carrying our baby.

Thank you for showering love and respect.

Thank you husband love letter

Thank you husband love letter

Thank you for always giving me importance over your career, other girls and your life.

Thank you for valuing the love and care we shared.

Thank you for never being unfaithful to me.

Thank you for showing trust in me as a mother and as a woman who gave up everything.

Thank you for not using people to fulfill the hidden motives.

Thank you for not betraying the faith I had on the institution of LOVE and MARRIAGE.

Thank you for always boosting my moral in my professional life so that I become an independent woman.

Thank you for keeping your promises “ Jab koi baat bigad jaye”

Thank you for bringing the best side of me and showing me Yes I can face the world.

Thank you for making me a strong woman, you took the fear out of me.

Thank you for looking into my eyes and saying no one can take my place.

Thank you for making me feel the luckiest woman and the most blessed mother.

Thank you for being my life line as there is not even a single day when I  felt neglected.

Thank you for respecting and embracing all the changes I had to make after I got married.

Thank you for not using my parents to the best ability and keeping your promise of taking care of them when they got old.

Thank you for being at my fathers side when he got a severe heart attack.

Thank you husband love letter

Thank you husband love letter

Thank you for taking care of me like a baby whenever I got sick.

Thank you for being at my side every sec of the unbearable pain I went through and when I got operated.

Thank you for being the most honest person any woman can have.

Thank you for going through the grind of raising a child.

Thank you for realizing that it’s very easy to be called a parent but the real side is when you fulfill the responsibility of being there as a parent.

Thank you husband love letter

Thank you husband love letter

Thank you for wiping away my tears and giving me a tight hug whenever I shared my insecurities.

Thank you for realizing my dreams and putting my needs first before yours.

Thank you for everything .

 

Will anyone drop me to the hospital? : An eye opening real life incident

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A few days back my father was dropping me to my house, we were just entering the society and  I saw a man abruptly coming on the road holding his son in his hands howling shivering  shouting his son’s name. I smelled something wrong and asked my father to stop the car so that I could just figure out as to what was wrong.

It was a crowded road and each and every passerby was gazing at the situation and then casually passing by.  I know we all get to hear plots where people deceive you by plotting a fake situation. But at that very moment by my gut feeling made me get out of the car and lend a helping hand to that guy who was literally howling as if he lost his son in his arms. I can never forget their screeching cry, being a parent I could see what he was going through.

The minute I saw the face of the child I sensed something was wrong. I hurriedly asked the family of the boy to sit in the car and asked my father to rush to the hospital. The outcry of both the parents was so agonizing, the way they held the child in their arms was something I was finding it so painful to see. I was praying to the god all through the time that I hope nothing goes wrong with their son. Thankfully, we could locate a nearby dispensary where we rushed the unconscious boy and quickly arranged a treatment for him. With the grace of god he recovered within few minutes of medical assistance. He was having 104 fever since one night before and they said being a Sunday they could not provide him with medical assistance. Whatever the reason was.. I am grateful to god for sending me at that crucial point of time to help that family when they needed it the most.

God bless!

We all walk alone…

How I got my girlfriend back

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The friends of mine who had a heartbreak need tips on How I got my girlfriend back.I thought it’s better to post online, wondering it might be helpful to many guys out there who miss their ex.

The process of contemplating how you much you invested in your relationship is something that really worked wonders for me. Majority of the relationships die a natural death because of basic of loss of respect, care, trust and attention. These emotions are just confined to just saying now. I LOVE YOU – I CARE FOR YOU.
Most of us don’t express their love with action and end up losing their partner.
It can help you regain the lost love.

Pen down the events-

freedomm

– 1. Did you support her in the big events of her life?
– We all go through good and tough phases in our lives. Pen down the most important phases of life where you expressed your care for her.

– 2. Did you ever break her trust?
– No relationship can survive without trust. The trust is the pillar of any relationship. Pen down the situations where you lied to her and broke her trust on you.

– 3. Did you do enough to make her feel that you care?
– The one supreme factor that makes you feel loved is the care that you show towards your partner. Did you make an effort in asking her what do you need? Write 10 main incidents where you took care of her basic needs before you fulfilled yours. Write 10 compliments that she gave you for taking care of her in the most loving way.

– 4. Did you listen to her of the things that were troubling her?
– There are times when the relationship die with each passing day. It’s natural to express what you expect from each other. Pen down the change of behavior that she expected from you and how successful you were in fulfilling it.

– 5. Did you offer her a sense of security?
All of us need to get settled down before we choose to get into the association of marriage. It’s fun to hang around in the college canteen, but after a while every couple has to face the reality of paying bills and then starting a family. Just “LOVE” for each other won’t take care of all the financial needs of running a family.Hence, get settled so that you can take care of the basic needs of the family.

– 6. Write simple act of kindness you did to bring a smile on her face.

– 7. Were you by her side when she needed you the most? Write the incidents and express “WHAT YOU DID”
And not “WHAT YOU SAID” Because action speaks louder than words

Don't say goodbye I love you letter

Don’t say goodbye I love you letter

Be true to yourself while answering these questions. If you think you played your part with whole dedication then don’t worry she will be in your arms.

I focused on all the factors and then apprehended my behavior towards her. I perceived and realized where I went wrong. I took a month to incorporate some of the expectations that she had from me, later on I felt a sense of confidence to approach her to forgive me.

Since then I never took little gestures of love for granted, that she really anticipated from me.
It was a happy ending for both of us where we truly love each other and can never think of being away.